As I sit back and reflect on 2009 I can honestly say I’m glad it’s over. I’m glad for a few reasons but let’s back track a bit first.
New Years Eve is always a time of reflection of the year gone by. However, this New Years Eve marks the end of the first decade of the 21st Century. 10 years is a lifetime is gay years! That’s like at least 5 jobs, 10 broken down relationships and 2 pets, 3 if you count the one lost in the break up battle. The only exception are the Lesbians, they tend to lose a U-Haul and a flannel shirt in the process! (I’m kidding of course....)
So I looked back on my personal life and the world as a whole and what has changed in the past 10 years? On the surface not allot really. I was looking at some New Years Eve pictures from 1999 and I look about the same. I just have a few more wrinkles and my goat-tee is peppered with grey. I did find a grey chest hair not long ago and did have a dream last night about someone shaving my chest but again, a blog for another time.
So while things look like they haven’t changed physically, everything around me has. In the past 10 years I moved to Ottawa, started a new job. I then met Randy and my entire life changed. I got married, became a step dad, and bought a car, a house and a dog. I met some amazing people and out of nowhere in the last part of the decade became a crazy spokesperson for the bear community. The constant thing that I noticed from New Years Eve 1999 is that the people I’m sitting with in that picture are still my friends today. I am blessed for that.
My party days are somewhat over although some of you who know me very well would beg to differ. I’m still fun at a party and I can drink most of you under the table. I just can’t get up from underneath the table after...
But some good changes happened in the world in the past 10 years. From a gay rights perspective in Canada, Bills C-23 homosexual equality rights bill passed in 2000, Bill-250, adding sexual orientation to the hate crime section of the criminal code in 2004 (a side note here, the Harper government intends to introduce legislation to remove it make it acceptable once again for hate propaganda towards gays to flourish) to Bill C-38 allowing us all to legally marry in 2005. Globally, AIDS/HIV has had reduced death rate of more than 17% in the past 10 years, regretfully, the rate of infection increases.
Allot has changed around us. Gone are the days about Y2K , Napster and CD’s we now refer to all sorts of new things like TWITTER, WooT, IPOD, IPHONE, PODCAST, 911, LOST, FACEBOOK and the list goes on. We communicate much differently than we did 10 years ago and I don’t think I’ve read a hard copied news paper in 4 or 5 years.
911 changed the world forever. Not just for Americans. Bush fucked it up for everyone by declaring a holy war on terror that instilled a continuous fear into the world that I honestly do not think it exists on such a mass scale. We have a leader in Canada who is more interested in control and power than he is in the people who he was elected to govern. I want to think and hope that Harper will not push the gay rights movement in Canada back 10 years. But when you are a fascist dictator (or try to rule like one) you become very unpredictable. I have faith that we are better than that. That Canadians will decide that they can rise to the occasion and purge the Country from both government and opposition. At any rate, it will be a rough few years.
So the end of 2009 is here! Let’s see the economy tanked, allot of people I worked with lost their jobs and my income and investments took a pummelling. Good riddance 2009!
Enough about that! Jesus I sound like a crazy activist!
They are all events and moments in time forever etched into our minds and memory banks. Streams of data stored away for future reference. Welcome to the forever changing world of technology. Hmmm, technology...We can store data faster than a blink of an eye yet we cannot make air travel faster, safer and cheaper. Flying in airplanes seems so archaic.
I hope that 2010 ushers in more change. Globally, I hope the way we do business changes. Nationally, I think I’ve best explained my thoughts in the paragraphs above. From our community, I hope that we grow as a bear community and respect our differences and those around us. From a LGBT perspective I want to see transgender rights acknowledged in the next year. I will not make any resolutions other than to be kind to people and laugh at myself when I make mistakes. If you see me laughing you’ll know why.
I do wish you all health, happiness, good fortune and love in 2010. I know it’s mushy and sentimental but it’s honest.
Happy New Year
Big old bear hugs
Mr. Ottawa Bear
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Tis’ the Season
December rolls around and all the mayhem and craziness about the holidays seem to impact us all. I was in line waiting to pay for lunch the other day when I overheard a customer say to another, “You cannot not have a tree! It won’t be Christmas”. What the hell did that mean? I guess for this lady Christmas only came if you had a tree.... I so wanted to turn to her and say” Honey I know plenty of things that come without a tree and yes there is allot of Oh Jesus, Oh My God involved”. That’s the extent of my religious beliefs!
Speaking of and without getting all religious on everyone, December is indeed dominated by several denominational holidays. From Bodhi Day to Hanukkah, Santa Lucia Day to Al Hijra to Christmas we seem to identify with all of them. But I set all that aside and think of what it really means and it’s about giving. OK dirty people I’m not talking about blow jobs in a back alley on a Saturday night next to CP’s. Although I think I’ve done that a few times...but I was drunk and he said he liked me! What was I saying? Giving. Well ok giving and receiving during the holidays works as well... Again, I know exactly where you're all going with this so let’s just get it out of the way now shall we.
Some of us like to give. Some of us like to receive. Some of us figure if we give a little we will get allot and then there are others that just want it. Sort of like I’ll kiss you and you can blow me. Or I’ll have sex with you if you pay for brunch!
Enough of that! So I reflected upon the year just passed and thought about my friends and co workers and the community. I hope I was able to give enough this year? I worked hard, I played just as hard and I tried to make the community we all take part in a better place. Could I have done more? I’m sure I could have. With more resources, more money, more people but I’m happy with what I did. And what did I receive in return? A thank you! Thank you from allot of you, from friends and family and co workers. That has meant more to me than any gift or card.
Too many people give in order to receive more or get noticed or whatever it is, they want something in return. I just give because I have a passion for things I do.
So however you may celebrate this December do it with the intention of giving something to someone. Whether you give your spot in line for the person who only has “one item to pay” or let the person drive out who’s been waiting forever to get by or even send a card or an email to someone you haven’t spoken to in a long time. Do it not to get something out of it just do it because you want to.
My favourite day in December is the 21st. Many of you may find this odd. It is of course Winter Solstice. For me personally it marks the beginning of the lengthening of days into summer. Ironically it is the shortest day of the year (sun wise) but I always feel like it’s a new beginning. That in this mad crazy world we live in there is always a new day.
A new day to discover and learn something new... and that for me is the best gift of all!
Big old Bear Hugs
Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009
Speaking of and without getting all religious on everyone, December is indeed dominated by several denominational holidays. From Bodhi Day to Hanukkah, Santa Lucia Day to Al Hijra to Christmas we seem to identify with all of them. But I set all that aside and think of what it really means and it’s about giving. OK dirty people I’m not talking about blow jobs in a back alley on a Saturday night next to CP’s. Although I think I’ve done that a few times...but I was drunk and he said he liked me! What was I saying? Giving. Well ok giving and receiving during the holidays works as well... Again, I know exactly where you're all going with this so let’s just get it out of the way now shall we.
Some of us like to give. Some of us like to receive. Some of us figure if we give a little we will get allot and then there are others that just want it. Sort of like I’ll kiss you and you can blow me. Or I’ll have sex with you if you pay for brunch!
Enough of that! So I reflected upon the year just passed and thought about my friends and co workers and the community. I hope I was able to give enough this year? I worked hard, I played just as hard and I tried to make the community we all take part in a better place. Could I have done more? I’m sure I could have. With more resources, more money, more people but I’m happy with what I did. And what did I receive in return? A thank you! Thank you from allot of you, from friends and family and co workers. That has meant more to me than any gift or card.
Too many people give in order to receive more or get noticed or whatever it is, they want something in return. I just give because I have a passion for things I do.
So however you may celebrate this December do it with the intention of giving something to someone. Whether you give your spot in line for the person who only has “one item to pay” or let the person drive out who’s been waiting forever to get by or even send a card or an email to someone you haven’t spoken to in a long time. Do it not to get something out of it just do it because you want to.
My favourite day in December is the 21st. Many of you may find this odd. It is of course Winter Solstice. For me personally it marks the beginning of the lengthening of days into summer. Ironically it is the shortest day of the year (sun wise) but I always feel like it’s a new beginning. That in this mad crazy world we live in there is always a new day.
A new day to discover and learn something new... and that for me is the best gift of all!
Big old Bear Hugs
Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
The Deal Breaker
Over the past few weeks I’ve been chatting with some bears and we got on the topic of boyfriends and what we look for in a potential mate. Well, ok let me start over. I was chatting with one sexy bear in particular. We’ll call him Mouse to protect his identity. He’s very shy and just a young guy, very cubbish and a smile that melts butta. When I say young I mean under 25. I know, for some of us, young means anyone not on a respirator but this guy is young. So Mouse is on a quest for a new boyfriend. I told him that guys under 25 should be having random sex and spending all their waking hours partying. But to each his own! So Mouse told me his potential boyfriend had to meet certain criteria. How gay of a statement. THE LIST. Oh come on we all have one. The “must haves” in a relationship are sometimes longer than the menu at McDonald’s. Hmm; “I’ll have a Mc Man with an order of Mc Tight Ass and some Mc Dick. Oh and a Mc Fuck to go!”
So Mouse’s deal breaker was a daddy bear. Easy enough I guess. He likes old dudes. Yeah like I want some old tool that needs Viagra to have fun! (This coming from a man whose blogging while listening to Debbie Gibson’s, Only in My Dreams. Who’s the old tool now!
But all this deal breaker talk got me thinking, there has to be more people who feel the same way. So in true Mr. Ottawa Bear form I sought answers from my fellow bears. Turns out we all have a list. Some very weird and some actually make sense. These are from the bears out there so don’t blame me for the strange answers! Here are my top 20 favourites:
20.BAD TEETH - Sorry brits, you need fluoride to date me.
19.THE WAY HE LAUGHS – Yeah I want to date someone who looks like Kevin James but laughs like Phyllis Diller.
18.LONG NAILS – Eeeeeewww! Ok please if you see a bear with long nails send them to Rob Myers at Celebrity Hair for a mani. Trust me.
17.SMALL FEET, BIG BODY – Jesus H. Christ who are these people?
16.HAS TO HAVE MONEY – What a shallow bear you are Eric. Shame on you!
15.NO CAPRI PANTS – The man who invented Capri’s for men should be shot. If I see you wearing them I’ll set fire to them or so help me God I will shave all your fur off. Hideous.
14.THEY HAVE TO COMMIT – If they can commit to not peeing on the floor then they’re a keeper.
13.NICE EYES – As opposed to ugly eyes? How does one...hmmm never mind.
12.WILLING TO WAIT 3 DATES BEFORE HAVING SEX –This person wonders why he’s still single.
11.TOO MUCH FORESKIN – Ok seriously honey, if you have to know then you have to bring them for a test drive and that makes you a big old ho’.
10.STRAIGHT ACTING – Isn’t it bad enough we have to live amongst them now we have to beat our wives and go on welfare?
9. ROMANTIC – It’s just not the same without the Family Guy and Burger King.
8. HAS TO BE CUTE- No wait! I want the ugly one! (Besides they usually have bigger dicks. I’m just sayin’)
7. HAS TO BE OVER 5ft4 – Don’t discriminate the Oompa Loompas! (Again big dicks. Oh please, you know it’s true!)
6. PORPORTIAL HEAD TO BODY – “Little head, meet Mr. Small feet”.
5. GOOD IN BED – Slutty! Slutty! Slutty!
4. CLEAN – Ok what situation would one be in where guys would be dirty and smelly in a bad way?
3. I’LL KNOW WHEN I SEE HIM – WTF kind of statement is that?
2. GOOD KISSER – I seriously made out with this guy that had a rough tongue like a cat and he did these little probing flicks for kisses... pointy little tongue darting in my mouth! Eeeeeeeeewwwww!
AND THE NUMBER 1 DEAL BREAKER...... THIS IS A TRUE ONE.....
1.SEMI INTELLIGENT – To me if you know your ABC’s and can read instructions to put on a condom then you’re ok. I’ll just drink allot and smile and say; “look at my shiny new boyfriend”. Clearly he has to be hot and willing to do as he’s told. We can’t have em’ too smart now eh?
As always big old bear hugs,
Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009
So Mouse’s deal breaker was a daddy bear. Easy enough I guess. He likes old dudes. Yeah like I want some old tool that needs Viagra to have fun! (This coming from a man whose blogging while listening to Debbie Gibson’s, Only in My Dreams. Who’s the old tool now!
But all this deal breaker talk got me thinking, there has to be more people who feel the same way. So in true Mr. Ottawa Bear form I sought answers from my fellow bears. Turns out we all have a list. Some very weird and some actually make sense. These are from the bears out there so don’t blame me for the strange answers! Here are my top 20 favourites:
20.BAD TEETH - Sorry brits, you need fluoride to date me.
19.THE WAY HE LAUGHS – Yeah I want to date someone who looks like Kevin James but laughs like Phyllis Diller.
18.LONG NAILS – Eeeeeewww! Ok please if you see a bear with long nails send them to Rob Myers at Celebrity Hair for a mani. Trust me.
17.SMALL FEET, BIG BODY – Jesus H. Christ who are these people?
16.HAS TO HAVE MONEY – What a shallow bear you are Eric. Shame on you!
15.NO CAPRI PANTS – The man who invented Capri’s for men should be shot. If I see you wearing them I’ll set fire to them or so help me God I will shave all your fur off. Hideous.
14.THEY HAVE TO COMMIT – If they can commit to not peeing on the floor then they’re a keeper.
13.NICE EYES – As opposed to ugly eyes? How does one...hmmm never mind.
12.WILLING TO WAIT 3 DATES BEFORE HAVING SEX –This person wonders why he’s still single.
11.TOO MUCH FORESKIN – Ok seriously honey, if you have to know then you have to bring them for a test drive and that makes you a big old ho’.
10.STRAIGHT ACTING – Isn’t it bad enough we have to live amongst them now we have to beat our wives and go on welfare?
9. ROMANTIC – It’s just not the same without the Family Guy and Burger King.
8. HAS TO BE CUTE- No wait! I want the ugly one! (Besides they usually have bigger dicks. I’m just sayin’)
7. HAS TO BE OVER 5ft4 – Don’t discriminate the Oompa Loompas! (Again big dicks. Oh please, you know it’s true!)
6. PORPORTIAL HEAD TO BODY – “Little head, meet Mr. Small feet”.
5. GOOD IN BED – Slutty! Slutty! Slutty!
4. CLEAN – Ok what situation would one be in where guys would be dirty and smelly in a bad way?
3. I’LL KNOW WHEN I SEE HIM – WTF kind of statement is that?
2. GOOD KISSER – I seriously made out with this guy that had a rough tongue like a cat and he did these little probing flicks for kisses... pointy little tongue darting in my mouth! Eeeeeeeeewwwww!
AND THE NUMBER 1 DEAL BREAKER...... THIS IS A TRUE ONE.....
1.SEMI INTELLIGENT – To me if you know your ABC’s and can read instructions to put on a condom then you’re ok. I’ll just drink allot and smile and say; “look at my shiny new boyfriend”. Clearly he has to be hot and willing to do as he’s told. We can’t have em’ too smart now eh?
As always big old bear hugs,
Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Daze of Summer
Done. The End. Summer is officially over. Fuck! Ok, so seriously it wasn’t all that bad. I mean it only rained 22 days in June. (that was the official count)
But that didn’t stop the bears in Ottawa. Everywhere I went, they seemed to have a good time. I guess summer really started in August. At least for the Ottawa Bears it did. Our logo launch at Breathless was a success and our float in the Capital Pride parade was pretty cool if you ask me. Every Pride event I attended everyone seemed to have a good time.
While on the topic of Pride in the Nation’s Capital it was actually allot of fun. It’s different than other Pride celebrations. It’s not as commercial as Toronto, yet not as liberal as Montreal. It’s one of those rare occasions that you can find something for everyone. I find people from Ottawa, the gay community included, just a tad up tight. Everyone wants Ottawa to be this great big city but nobody is quite sure how to push it forward. During Pride week, I think that Ottawa has come a long way in trying to captivate this concept. Of course it can be better. Everything can be better. If you want more, get involved. It’s as simple as that. I had a conversation with someone from the bear community who complained constantly that Ottawa had nothing to offer. In his mind, everything was boring. He didn’t like what the bears where doing, didn’t like the bars, thought Bank Street lacked atmosphere and character. Yet he rarely attended any events and yet the same coffee shop in Ottawa he said was a dump, he would frequent in Montreal. So as polite as a Mr. Ottawa Bear can be, (remember folks I’m supposed to be an ambassador for the bear community) I told him he could do one of two things. Help make the gay community something to be proud of or no longer attend functions and keep his fucking mouth shut. He chose to keep his mouth shut. Thank God. There is nothing worse than someone who complains and yet has no plan or idea to change what they don’t like. What’s changed in Ottawa this past year is that the complainers actually have ideas to change things! Thank you!
So my advice to everyone in Ottawa is to support your community. We have something to offer. We are not Montreal. We are not Toronto. Ok, come on, do you seriously want to live with 4 million people? Go right ahead. You love the night life in Montreal? Then go on weekends. But trust me; these cities have the same bullshit and the same drama as any other city. I think Ottawa has finally figured some things out about itself. It needs to have something unique to attract people. We need to make Ottawa a city that you want to stop off on your way to Toronto or Montreal. What that is remains to be seen but we’ll get there.
A village you say? I don’t know. I’m a suburbanite now. I no longer take part of a downtown core and I always believed that we could live amongst the breeders. We still can. I don’t look at quarters or districts or ghettos. They are terms most people seem to fear. I look at a village as a pocket on a coat. Every pocket serves a purpose to the coat. As a coat, the pockets hold certain things for specific occasions. Ottawa is just that. Little Italy, China Town, The Glebe (fuck I can’t believe I’m calling the Glebe useful) and why not a village? So what if a bunch of shops or restaurants put up some pride flags and support the gay community? What’s the worse than can happen? People will actually make use of section of the city. Gay peoeple will wander the streets amongst the straights... I thought they did that already so what's the big deal? Personally it’s fun to go for coffee when the crowd is a little on the queer side and the music is either Judy or Billie Holiday. Come on, be gay for one afternoon! I have faith in the good gays of Ottawa. They’ll get it right. It may take time but they’ll get it right eventually. We have to start someplace.
So I guess this summer was a learning experience for me. I attended as many functions and events as I possibly could in different segments of the gay community to get a better handle on what makes Ottawa tick. But then I realized at the end of my journey that what makes Ottawa tick is me. It’s me and you and everyone around us. We really are what makes Ottawa the city it is. Our gay community is a reflection of who we are. We may not like some of it or find that we don’t identify with parts of it but we embrace it. At least I do.
It could be worse; we could all be living in Dildo, Newfoundland. Come to think of it, that may not be so bad? It’s only a jump away from Spread Eagle. Now that’s another blog!
Until next time,
Big old bear hugs
Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009
But that didn’t stop the bears in Ottawa. Everywhere I went, they seemed to have a good time. I guess summer really started in August. At least for the Ottawa Bears it did. Our logo launch at Breathless was a success and our float in the Capital Pride parade was pretty cool if you ask me. Every Pride event I attended everyone seemed to have a good time.
While on the topic of Pride in the Nation’s Capital it was actually allot of fun. It’s different than other Pride celebrations. It’s not as commercial as Toronto, yet not as liberal as Montreal. It’s one of those rare occasions that you can find something for everyone. I find people from Ottawa, the gay community included, just a tad up tight. Everyone wants Ottawa to be this great big city but nobody is quite sure how to push it forward. During Pride week, I think that Ottawa has come a long way in trying to captivate this concept. Of course it can be better. Everything can be better. If you want more, get involved. It’s as simple as that. I had a conversation with someone from the bear community who complained constantly that Ottawa had nothing to offer. In his mind, everything was boring. He didn’t like what the bears where doing, didn’t like the bars, thought Bank Street lacked atmosphere and character. Yet he rarely attended any events and yet the same coffee shop in Ottawa he said was a dump, he would frequent in Montreal. So as polite as a Mr. Ottawa Bear can be, (remember folks I’m supposed to be an ambassador for the bear community) I told him he could do one of two things. Help make the gay community something to be proud of or no longer attend functions and keep his fucking mouth shut. He chose to keep his mouth shut. Thank God. There is nothing worse than someone who complains and yet has no plan or idea to change what they don’t like. What’s changed in Ottawa this past year is that the complainers actually have ideas to change things! Thank you!
So my advice to everyone in Ottawa is to support your community. We have something to offer. We are not Montreal. We are not Toronto. Ok, come on, do you seriously want to live with 4 million people? Go right ahead. You love the night life in Montreal? Then go on weekends. But trust me; these cities have the same bullshit and the same drama as any other city. I think Ottawa has finally figured some things out about itself. It needs to have something unique to attract people. We need to make Ottawa a city that you want to stop off on your way to Toronto or Montreal. What that is remains to be seen but we’ll get there.
A village you say? I don’t know. I’m a suburbanite now. I no longer take part of a downtown core and I always believed that we could live amongst the breeders. We still can. I don’t look at quarters or districts or ghettos. They are terms most people seem to fear. I look at a village as a pocket on a coat. Every pocket serves a purpose to the coat. As a coat, the pockets hold certain things for specific occasions. Ottawa is just that. Little Italy, China Town, The Glebe (fuck I can’t believe I’m calling the Glebe useful) and why not a village? So what if a bunch of shops or restaurants put up some pride flags and support the gay community? What’s the worse than can happen? People will actually make use of section of the city. Gay peoeple will wander the streets amongst the straights... I thought they did that already so what's the big deal? Personally it’s fun to go for coffee when the crowd is a little on the queer side and the music is either Judy or Billie Holiday. Come on, be gay for one afternoon! I have faith in the good gays of Ottawa. They’ll get it right. It may take time but they’ll get it right eventually. We have to start someplace.
So I guess this summer was a learning experience for me. I attended as many functions and events as I possibly could in different segments of the gay community to get a better handle on what makes Ottawa tick. But then I realized at the end of my journey that what makes Ottawa tick is me. It’s me and you and everyone around us. We really are what makes Ottawa the city it is. Our gay community is a reflection of who we are. We may not like some of it or find that we don’t identify with parts of it but we embrace it. At least I do.
It could be worse; we could all be living in Dildo, Newfoundland. Come to think of it, that may not be so bad? It’s only a jump away from Spread Eagle. Now that’s another blog!
Until next time,
Big old bear hugs
Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009
Monday, August 3, 2009
What it means to be versatile
Ok so I’ve been pondering this for some time and quite frankly I’m lost with the whole notion. Throughout my million chats along all sorts of sites, I’ve encountered all sorts of men in the bear world but one thing confuses me. It seems that we as bears have a hard time pin pointing our sexual position. Are we Tops, Bottoms or Versatile? The first two seem self explanatory enough and I find these types of bears very secure and confidant in their quest for sex. But there also seems to be some form of sub group amongst them. So I’ve dissected the Tops, the Bottoms and those funny creatures who call themselves Versatile men into three groups. And here they are:
The Top
But then to confuse matters there are tops that are somewhat submissive. They like to fuck however don’t really want to be dominant. I call them:
Lazy Tops: They would rather you do all the work. This guy sort of expects you to earn it. You often hear this guy say: “Hey why don’t you hop up on this buddy”, or “Don’t be shy. Let me lie back here while I watch you do all the work. ” I mean really.
Now when you think it can’t get any more confusing with these guys there is one more:
Flop Tops: Well they say they’re tops but then they change their mind. Seems they always get a case of the I-want-to-try-to-bottom-for-my-first-time-and-I-want-to-do-it-with-you syndrome. Ya! Like I would ever be the first in THAT tunnel of love.....
The Bottom
110% Bottoms, aka the dead fuck: Seriously. This type of guy puts his butt in the air and waits. Don’t ever have outdoor sex with this guy because if it rains, he’s bound to fill up and float away! I had to ask a guy once what 110% bottom meant. He said he does not provide oral service and prefers none to be performed on him. He is there for the explicit pleasure of receiving anal sex. Wow... BOARING! Honey they call it dead for a reason!
Basic Bottoms: They do all the stuff tops do except they receive. Easy enough right? I also find these guys want to make you breakfast in bed... hmm weird. They do make a nice omelette though...
The aggressive Bottom: Bless these men. Ha! Ha! They are dominant, aggressive, take the lead and then take it! Rest assured they confuse Tops and tend to want to lead the way. Most Tops will oblige but in the end they always show the Bottom who’s in control. They tend to be the butt of all jokes. (Yes pun intended)
The Versatile
Ok, there is only one category for this guy. Bottom. Period. I’ve never met so many men who claim to be versatile and they are TOTAL Bottoms lol. If you pair up with a mate to have sex and he says: “I’ll go first then I’ll do you after” chances are you’re not getting any. In all fairness there are true versatile men out there. A buddy of mine from New Brunswick and his partner flip flop every night as they claim to be 100% versatile. They take turns. Every night. But then I thought about that and the fact that they’ve been together for 10yrs and I think it’s a bit odd. I mean what happens if one of them wants to be the bottom but not the top the next night? What do you do when you both want to be the bottom? Draw straws? Do you start keeping track? “Ok, so I’ve bottomed three times this week, you owe me!” It’s all so clinical and complicated now. Personally I can’t see myself keeping a “fuck sheet” beside my night stand with the lube and the poppers! Noticed how I forgot to ask about the fact that they are still having sexy every night after 10 years? A smell a follow up story there...
So to wrap up let me say this. Does it really matter? Are we not all out to have fun, safe and healthy sexual relationships? I don’t think of Bottoms as less male than their Top counterparts or vice versa. The Versatile guys well... you need more work. Maybe some therapy would help work out the lack of nurturing parental needs while growing up? Or what I like to say to guys who are a bit up tight; “You need a good fuck!” At any rate we should all show some versatility in our interaction within our sexual community. Worry less about finding what box fits you and focus more on how many boxes you can fit into!
Until next time, Top of the mornin’ to ya and Bottom’s up or maybe a bit of both!
Big warm bear hugs,
MOB09
The Top
True Tops: I always pictured a Top to be a very dominant and aggressive man sexually. You know who you are. The one who flips you over in bed before you even have time to take off those sexy Calvin’s! It’s either that or you’re having a close encounter with your ankles! You may hear yourself say: “Wow, I’m flexible after all!”
Lazy Tops: They would rather you do all the work. This guy sort of expects you to earn it. You often hear this guy say: “Hey why don’t you hop up on this buddy”, or “Don’t be shy. Let me lie back here while I watch you do all the work. ” I mean really.
Now when you think it can’t get any more confusing with these guys there is one more:
Flop Tops: Well they say they’re tops but then they change their mind. Seems they always get a case of the I-want-to-try-to-bottom-for-my-first-time-and-I-want-to-do-it-with-you syndrome. Ya! Like I would ever be the first in THAT tunnel of love.....
The Bottom
110% Bottoms, aka the dead fuck: Seriously. This type of guy puts his butt in the air and waits. Don’t ever have outdoor sex with this guy because if it rains, he’s bound to fill up and float away! I had to ask a guy once what 110% bottom meant. He said he does not provide oral service and prefers none to be performed on him. He is there for the explicit pleasure of receiving anal sex. Wow... BOARING! Honey they call it dead for a reason!
Basic Bottoms: They do all the stuff tops do except they receive. Easy enough right? I also find these guys want to make you breakfast in bed... hmm weird. They do make a nice omelette though...
The aggressive Bottom: Bless these men. Ha! Ha! They are dominant, aggressive, take the lead and then take it! Rest assured they confuse Tops and tend to want to lead the way. Most Tops will oblige but in the end they always show the Bottom who’s in control. They tend to be the butt of all jokes. (Yes pun intended)
The Versatile
Ok, there is only one category for this guy. Bottom. Period. I’ve never met so many men who claim to be versatile and they are TOTAL Bottoms lol. If you pair up with a mate to have sex and he says: “I’ll go first then I’ll do you after” chances are you’re not getting any. In all fairness there are true versatile men out there. A buddy of mine from New Brunswick and his partner flip flop every night as they claim to be 100% versatile. They take turns. Every night. But then I thought about that and the fact that they’ve been together for 10yrs and I think it’s a bit odd. I mean what happens if one of them wants to be the bottom but not the top the next night? What do you do when you both want to be the bottom? Draw straws? Do you start keeping track? “Ok, so I’ve bottomed three times this week, you owe me!” It’s all so clinical and complicated now. Personally I can’t see myself keeping a “fuck sheet” beside my night stand with the lube and the poppers! Noticed how I forgot to ask about the fact that they are still having sexy every night after 10 years? A smell a follow up story there...
So to wrap up let me say this. Does it really matter? Are we not all out to have fun, safe and healthy sexual relationships? I don’t think of Bottoms as less male than their Top counterparts or vice versa. The Versatile guys well... you need more work. Maybe some therapy would help work out the lack of nurturing parental needs while growing up? Or what I like to say to guys who are a bit up tight; “You need a good fuck!” At any rate we should all show some versatility in our interaction within our sexual community. Worry less about finding what box fits you and focus more on how many boxes you can fit into!
Until next time, Top of the mornin’ to ya and Bottom’s up or maybe a bit of both!
Big warm bear hugs,
MOB09
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Toronto Pride, a gay celebration?
Ok so I got back last night late in the pm after spending 4 days in Toronto for Pride. This was not my first trip to Pride. I was there plenty of times when I lived there in the early 90’s and after a long absence was there last year.
Things have changed. Dramatically. Even since last year. Gone are the days of actual protests. No more marching for queer rights. Gone are the days of awkward police presence, the lack of media coverage and the people who used to go watch the parade for the sole purpose to “look at all the freaks”.
Today, Toronto Pride is world renown. Embraced by the city, promoted by stores, pride flags everywhere and it has become one big party. Or has it? Something that used to be celebrated from College and Church to Yonge up to Isabella and back down Church as morphed into something city wide.
I so don’t want to be disrespectful to the Toronto LGBTQT community but it is no longer a “gay” event. It has been taken over by corporations hungry to make money off the all mighty queer dollar. You see, businesses figured out a few years back that queers spent money and they were missing out. This is ever so present at The Bay (the flagship store on Queen St) with all the pride flags and logo’s of “Proud “everywhere. At first glance, people must think, “What a progressive city this is! The LGBTQT community is loved and embraced by everyone.” Regretfully what is loved and embraced is your money. What was different this year from the others is that everyone was selling something. From t-shirts, to mugs, wrist bands, flags, watches, pamphlets, tattoos, bandanas, dog collars and oh my! The list goes on. I felt like I was walking in the market district in Cuba with kids thrusting t-shirts and souvenirs in my face for a buck. I was appalled to see the RCMP asking people it they wanted a bracelet only to find out they do charged a small fee. All of the traditional info vendors had been pushed to the side streets off Church to make way for food vendors and money makers. The worst thing was the group of people holding up binders in your face asking you to help sick kids, for a price of course. What does a sick child have to do with Pride? They were clearly there for money making and that was beyond tasteless.
Not all was bad. I did walk through the village and saw some of my favourite vendors, chatted with friends I had not seen in a long time or guys I chat with on Bear411 and Bearforest. I did attend the Beef Ball. It hurt to pay $40 plus for tickets just to get in the door. But it was well worth it. No waiting in line and there was beer a plenty! The music was not my favourite choice but I still managed to move around. Funny thing was that I saw more bears and leather guys from everywhere else BUT Toronto. Have the bears given up on their own city? There is a huge rift in the community and I will not get into that right now. That’s for another time. I will say this. As Mr. Ottawa Bear I will not take sides with any particular part of the Bear community. I was invited to participate in a Bear event but was asked that if I did I could not go to the Beef Ball. So I opted out. I let this visit to Toronto be about embracing all aspects of Pride and I will not side with one particular group. Enough said about that for now. The shuttle service to and from the event was worth it as well. Beats taking a cab as the event is on Queen St East.
At the end of the day, my trip to Toronto was ok. It was not fantastic or amazing, it was ok. Maybe we don’t need parades and week-long celebrations to make claim as to who we are? Maybe we’ve accomplished all we set out to do with few barriers left to break down? I doubt it. No Pride celebrations would be as silly as no Canada Day. Whatever you decide to do for Pride celebrations remember those who made it possible. Remember those who fought for your rights to same sex benefits, legalized gay marriage, decriminalize homosexuality, to make it ok to hold your partners hand and to stand up for what you believe in.
I recently raised the pride flag at Bank of America for a community fair early in June. It was the first time in BoA corporate history that they flew the pride flag. I stood in the pouring rain hoisting the flag and thought about Gilbert Baker, one of Harvey Milk’s good friends, who created the pride flag. It occurred to me how proud they would be, these two great men from San Francisco that some 30 years down the road a Mr. Bear in an unofficial role would raise the flag that Gilbert Baker created. It was a moving moment. I understood the meaning of Gay Pride.
With respect to Toronto, maybe I needed to take off my jaded colored glasses and take a closer look at what Pride really had to offer?
Until next time, big warm bear hugs
MOB09
Things have changed. Dramatically. Even since last year. Gone are the days of actual protests. No more marching for queer rights. Gone are the days of awkward police presence, the lack of media coverage and the people who used to go watch the parade for the sole purpose to “look at all the freaks”.
Today, Toronto Pride is world renown. Embraced by the city, promoted by stores, pride flags everywhere and it has become one big party. Or has it? Something that used to be celebrated from College and Church to Yonge up to Isabella and back down Church as morphed into something city wide.
I so don’t want to be disrespectful to the Toronto LGBTQT community but it is no longer a “gay” event. It has been taken over by corporations hungry to make money off the all mighty queer dollar. You see, businesses figured out a few years back that queers spent money and they were missing out. This is ever so present at The Bay (the flagship store on Queen St) with all the pride flags and logo’s of “Proud “everywhere. At first glance, people must think, “What a progressive city this is! The LGBTQT community is loved and embraced by everyone.” Regretfully what is loved and embraced is your money. What was different this year from the others is that everyone was selling something. From t-shirts, to mugs, wrist bands, flags, watches, pamphlets, tattoos, bandanas, dog collars and oh my! The list goes on. I felt like I was walking in the market district in Cuba with kids thrusting t-shirts and souvenirs in my face for a buck. I was appalled to see the RCMP asking people it they wanted a bracelet only to find out they do charged a small fee. All of the traditional info vendors had been pushed to the side streets off Church to make way for food vendors and money makers. The worst thing was the group of people holding up binders in your face asking you to help sick kids, for a price of course. What does a sick child have to do with Pride? They were clearly there for money making and that was beyond tasteless.
Not all was bad. I did walk through the village and saw some of my favourite vendors, chatted with friends I had not seen in a long time or guys I chat with on Bear411 and Bearforest. I did attend the Beef Ball. It hurt to pay $40 plus for tickets just to get in the door. But it was well worth it. No waiting in line and there was beer a plenty! The music was not my favourite choice but I still managed to move around. Funny thing was that I saw more bears and leather guys from everywhere else BUT Toronto. Have the bears given up on their own city? There is a huge rift in the community and I will not get into that right now. That’s for another time. I will say this. As Mr. Ottawa Bear I will not take sides with any particular part of the Bear community. I was invited to participate in a Bear event but was asked that if I did I could not go to the Beef Ball. So I opted out. I let this visit to Toronto be about embracing all aspects of Pride and I will not side with one particular group. Enough said about that for now. The shuttle service to and from the event was worth it as well. Beats taking a cab as the event is on Queen St East.
At the end of the day, my trip to Toronto was ok. It was not fantastic or amazing, it was ok. Maybe we don’t need parades and week-long celebrations to make claim as to who we are? Maybe we’ve accomplished all we set out to do with few barriers left to break down? I doubt it. No Pride celebrations would be as silly as no Canada Day. Whatever you decide to do for Pride celebrations remember those who made it possible. Remember those who fought for your rights to same sex benefits, legalized gay marriage, decriminalize homosexuality, to make it ok to hold your partners hand and to stand up for what you believe in.
I recently raised the pride flag at Bank of America for a community fair early in June. It was the first time in BoA corporate history that they flew the pride flag. I stood in the pouring rain hoisting the flag and thought about Gilbert Baker, one of Harvey Milk’s good friends, who created the pride flag. It occurred to me how proud they would be, these two great men from San Francisco that some 30 years down the road a Mr. Bear in an unofficial role would raise the flag that Gilbert Baker created. It was a moving moment. I understood the meaning of Gay Pride.
With respect to Toronto, maybe I needed to take off my jaded colored glasses and take a closer look at what Pride really had to offer?
Until next time, big warm bear hugs
MOB09
Monday, June 22, 2009
Bed Bath and Way Beyond! A guide to the Ottawa Baths
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Saturday, April 18, 2009
The Sugar Rush!
OK! I know! After professing that I would be on here more often that didn’t happen. So now I have a million things to tell you so get ready for a series of blogs.
Last March the boys from Montreal held their 5th annual Sugarbear weekend! (March26th to 29th) Woot! What a rush! All those hot hairy bears, warm weather and the trip to the sugar shack went straight to my head. (Yes pun intended). (Please visit www.sugarbearweekend.com)
I arrived on the Thursday night for their meet and greet at Bar Stud (www.studbar.com). Someone should have told me that they spell “meet” in Montreal “meat” because...well let’s just say they’re very friendly men. I’m not complaining, don’t get me wrong. Mr. Ottawa Bear does love the attention, although I should have worn a sign that said: “rub here” HAHAHAHAHA!
Friday brought more fun at the bear fashion show sponsored be evenours. (www.evenours.org). The boys from the fashion show invited Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009 as they where presenting local winners from various contest so I was honoured to be there. I had a great time at the rehearsal as I got to see the guts of a show getting put together. The evening started off with a diner, followed by the fashion show and of course, yours truly, ran on stage to strut his stuff. I had a blast! What a great crowd!
Saturday we all met in front of Bar Stud and boarded the yellow buses and set off for the sugar shack. OK here’s the thing, if you are meeting a bunch of bears heading off to the sugar shack early in the morning, try to get to bed before 5am so that you are coherent on the ride there! I slept most of the way. I didn’t sleep on the way back as some of the bears decided that they were determined to bring Broadway into the bus. It was either Broadway of some very harsh barber quartet. Either way don’t quit your day job guys! Sorry......
But the sugar shack was awesome! I had a great time. I’ve been to a sugar shack in New Brunswick when I was a kid so it was like going back in time. The music, the atmosphere, the long lumber jack tables full of food, the maple toffee... if you have never been it is a must. The sugar shack it truly Canadian iconic. I think everyone should experience it at least once in their life.
So with a full belly of food and maple candy to last me at least a trip back to Ottawa we headed back to Stud Bar for a beer compliments of Labatt’s. Thank you Labatt’s! You’re products taste even better when it’s free! Saturday night was followed by a dance party at Bain Mathieu, and then everyone migrated back to the village for last call. I managed to get back to my hotel in time to change and catch the 12:30pm but back to Ottawa. I unfortunately had to leave a bit early and I missed the last part of the weekend. They had a lumberjack competition. Hmmm now that would have been fun to watch. I heard it was a blast. Sawdust and fur everywhere I’m sure lol!
I cannot say enough about the weekend. It was a fantastic time. I met guys from all over Canada and as far away as Kentucky. I also met a wonderful couple for New York City that plan on moving to Canada. They truly love this Country. Who can blame them it’s the best in the world (minus the crappy conservatives but hopefully that will change).
To the organizers at sugarbear, in particular, Michel and Nick, to the boys from evenours, Yan, Yves, Martin, that you all for making me feel at home. Your hospitability and kindness stays close to my heart.
To those who attended, see you next year! For those who did not, guys you missed out! You have to go! See you all at sugarbear 2010!
Big warm bear hugs,
MOB09
Last March the boys from Montreal held their 5th annual Sugarbear weekend! (March26th to 29th) Woot! What a rush! All those hot hairy bears, warm weather and the trip to the sugar shack went straight to my head. (Yes pun intended). (Please visit www.sugarbearweekend.com)
I arrived on the Thursday night for their meet and greet at Bar Stud (www.studbar.com). Someone should have told me that they spell “meet” in Montreal “meat” because...well let’s just say they’re very friendly men. I’m not complaining, don’t get me wrong. Mr. Ottawa Bear does love the attention, although I should have worn a sign that said: “rub here” HAHAHAHAHA!
Friday brought more fun at the bear fashion show sponsored be evenours. (www.evenours.org). The boys from the fashion show invited Mr. Ottawa Bear 2009 as they where presenting local winners from various contest so I was honoured to be there. I had a great time at the rehearsal as I got to see the guts of a show getting put together. The evening started off with a diner, followed by the fashion show and of course, yours truly, ran on stage to strut his stuff. I had a blast! What a great crowd!
Saturday we all met in front of Bar Stud and boarded the yellow buses and set off for the sugar shack. OK here’s the thing, if you are meeting a bunch of bears heading off to the sugar shack early in the morning, try to get to bed before 5am so that you are coherent on the ride there! I slept most of the way. I didn’t sleep on the way back as some of the bears decided that they were determined to bring Broadway into the bus. It was either Broadway of some very harsh barber quartet. Either way don’t quit your day job guys! Sorry......
But the sugar shack was awesome! I had a great time. I’ve been to a sugar shack in New Brunswick when I was a kid so it was like going back in time. The music, the atmosphere, the long lumber jack tables full of food, the maple toffee... if you have never been it is a must. The sugar shack it truly Canadian iconic. I think everyone should experience it at least once in their life.
So with a full belly of food and maple candy to last me at least a trip back to Ottawa we headed back to Stud Bar for a beer compliments of Labatt’s. Thank you Labatt’s! You’re products taste even better when it’s free! Saturday night was followed by a dance party at Bain Mathieu, and then everyone migrated back to the village for last call. I managed to get back to my hotel in time to change and catch the 12:30pm but back to Ottawa. I unfortunately had to leave a bit early and I missed the last part of the weekend. They had a lumberjack competition. Hmmm now that would have been fun to watch. I heard it was a blast. Sawdust and fur everywhere I’m sure lol!
I cannot say enough about the weekend. It was a fantastic time. I met guys from all over Canada and as far away as Kentucky. I also met a wonderful couple for New York City that plan on moving to Canada. They truly love this Country. Who can blame them it’s the best in the world (minus the crappy conservatives but hopefully that will change).
To the organizers at sugarbear, in particular, Michel and Nick, to the boys from evenours, Yan, Yves, Martin, that you all for making me feel at home. Your hospitability and kindness stays close to my heart.
To those who attended, see you next year! For those who did not, guys you missed out! You have to go! See you all at sugarbear 2010!
Big warm bear hugs,
MOB09
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Twenty, Thirty, Forty something
Today was an interesting day. As I sit down to bring an end to Sunday’s events, a million things run through my mind; however, this one stands out the most.
The oursottawabears held their monthly brunch at Father’s & Sons restaurant. I was surprised that I actually had a good time with a university crowd. Father’s & Sons is smack in the middle of the University of Ottawa campus on 112 ½ Osgoode St. This place is loud and busy spot full of young kids.
I think as we age we fear young people. We think that they will never understand who we are and look at us more or less like a parental figurehead who “just doesn’t get it” anymore. Maybe that’s my own paranoia being that I’m a step dad to a 20 year old university kid. Whichever the case, one guy asked me if I was the “bear dude leader” so I sort of said yes (sorry Angus I took credit this time) and he just said “ah kewl”. I won someone’s approval today that old people contribute to society in some fashion. Most looked at this group of mature, furry, extra pounds-of-love-handles types with mild curiosity. While I don’t think that they knew the full nature of our organisation, I do think that the students understood that we all share a common theme of belonging and of brotherhood.
When you see young kids and they are acting crazy and loud remember we’ve all been down that road. They don’t have the 20 years plus on their belts that we do and have not developed their socially acceptable adult skill set. And really, don’t we all act silly and crazy when we go out with our friends? Are we really on our best behaviour as adults all the time? I think not. How boring if we where... Better yet if you see me turn into to someone like that, come over and bitch slap me! Trust me, it would be my pleasure to do it to you!!!
The point to this lesson today is about respect. Appreciate the fact that young and old, big or little, furry or not, we all come out to be with people we like to have a great time. We want to be heard, be loud, be seen and loved.
It’s ok to be silly. After all, that twenty year old lives in all of us...
Until next time
MOB09
The oursottawabears held their monthly brunch at Father’s & Sons restaurant. I was surprised that I actually had a good time with a university crowd. Father’s & Sons is smack in the middle of the University of Ottawa campus on 112 ½ Osgoode St. This place is loud and busy spot full of young kids.
I think as we age we fear young people. We think that they will never understand who we are and look at us more or less like a parental figurehead who “just doesn’t get it” anymore. Maybe that’s my own paranoia being that I’m a step dad to a 20 year old university kid. Whichever the case, one guy asked me if I was the “bear dude leader” so I sort of said yes (sorry Angus I took credit this time) and he just said “ah kewl”. I won someone’s approval today that old people contribute to society in some fashion. Most looked at this group of mature, furry, extra pounds-of-love-handles types with mild curiosity. While I don’t think that they knew the full nature of our organisation, I do think that the students understood that we all share a common theme of belonging and of brotherhood.
When you see young kids and they are acting crazy and loud remember we’ve all been down that road. They don’t have the 20 years plus on their belts that we do and have not developed their socially acceptable adult skill set. And really, don’t we all act silly and crazy when we go out with our friends? Are we really on our best behaviour as adults all the time? I think not. How boring if we where... Better yet if you see me turn into to someone like that, come over and bitch slap me! Trust me, it would be my pleasure to do it to you!!!
The point to this lesson today is about respect. Appreciate the fact that young and old, big or little, furry or not, we all come out to be with people we like to have a great time. We want to be heard, be loud, be seen and loved.
It’s ok to be silly. After all, that twenty year old lives in all of us...
Until next time
MOB09
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Starting Fresh
First let me just say that I am normally up to speed on things. My intention to create a blog was to keep everyone informed of my rendition of events and things of interest in the City. Sorry peeps, two posts just doesn’t cut it.
I have been busy with many things and deathly ill with a sinus infection at the same time. Before we get into the “what not to do while taking antibiotics” I’ll talk about this and that in the community.
The February brunch for the Ottawa Bears was held at The Black Thorn in the market. Check them out at www.theblackthorn.ca . Nice place, great atmosphere and gay friendly. They have to be if they are going to have 36 big old burly bears show up with empty bellies and a big appetite! However I’ve yet to meet an establishment that is not gay friendly to the tons of queer dollars we spend on them! Lol Seriously thank you Black Thorn for letting the Ottawa Bears host their brunch in your establishment.
The main focus in February was to get things sorted out with the Ottawa Bears board and the annual general meeting. I literally spent the month making contacts and encouraging everyone to sign up, join, and become a member and vote! The end result, a new board! But it gets better. A new board, a new website, fresh ideas and we added 33 NEW MEMBERS!!! A huge success and thank you to everyone who listened to me babble nonstop over the past month. We’ve got some great guys on board and they will no doubt do some amazing things. Angus Mac Isaac is the president and with that brings allot of enthusiasm. We have Shawn Mac Isaac who will take over as the brunch co coordinator, Allan Proulx (runner up in this year’s MOB and he’s very furry and sexy) who will be our events co coordinator. Two former board members stay on, Ben Cooper, our secretary and last but certainly not least Marcel Forget who will take over as treasurer. This is a great team and I encourage you all to contact them and share your thoughts and ideas to grow the OOB (oursottawabears) in the years to come. Visit the website at www.oursottawabears.com.
I’m sure 2009 will be the year that the bears in this city take over Ottawa! Grrr I can’t wait. We need to get this City out of hibernation. Until next time.
Big bear hugs,
MOB09
I have been busy with many things and deathly ill with a sinus infection at the same time. Before we get into the “what not to do while taking antibiotics” I’ll talk about this and that in the community.
The February brunch for the Ottawa Bears was held at The Black Thorn in the market. Check them out at www.theblackthorn.ca . Nice place, great atmosphere and gay friendly. They have to be if they are going to have 36 big old burly bears show up with empty bellies and a big appetite! However I’ve yet to meet an establishment that is not gay friendly to the tons of queer dollars we spend on them! Lol Seriously thank you Black Thorn for letting the Ottawa Bears host their brunch in your establishment.
The main focus in February was to get things sorted out with the Ottawa Bears board and the annual general meeting. I literally spent the month making contacts and encouraging everyone to sign up, join, and become a member and vote! The end result, a new board! But it gets better. A new board, a new website, fresh ideas and we added 33 NEW MEMBERS!!! A huge success and thank you to everyone who listened to me babble nonstop over the past month. We’ve got some great guys on board and they will no doubt do some amazing things. Angus Mac Isaac is the president and with that brings allot of enthusiasm. We have Shawn Mac Isaac who will take over as the brunch co coordinator, Allan Proulx (runner up in this year’s MOB and he’s very furry and sexy) who will be our events co coordinator. Two former board members stay on, Ben Cooper, our secretary and last but certainly not least Marcel Forget who will take over as treasurer. This is a great team and I encourage you all to contact them and share your thoughts and ideas to grow the OOB (oursottawabears) in the years to come. Visit the website at www.oursottawabears.com.
I’m sure 2009 will be the year that the bears in this city take over Ottawa! Grrr I can’t wait. We need to get this City out of hibernation. Until next time.
Big bear hugs,
MOB09
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Check Please!
I had my first official public function last Friday and that was to present a check to Prink Triangle Services. The Ottawa Bears raised funds by selling 50/50 tickets for PTS during the Mr. Ottawa Bear competition on January 17th so it was our way of giving back to the community and to such a wonderful organization. Thank you Wes and to everyone at Pink Triangle Services. I look forward to working with you this year. (please check out their website at www.pinktriangle.org).
It seems that in these difficult economic times everyone is looking for a little something. Usually in form of cash of check.
There is nothing wrong with that. I'm a beleiver of those who CAN give and those who don't know that there is no shame in taking so long as you give back in some way.
Every company today is cutting back. Every job and function and spending account is being scruitinized. I find that charities and not for profit will suffer at the hands of the current recession. Economist already predict that thousands of not for profit organizations in our community will suffer their demise over tight purse strings.
Then there is the GLBT community. Often you will hear people say: "The gays have money to burn because they have high disposable incomes". Great if you don't have a mortgage, a husband, kids and a dog to feed.
So before you go out on a weekend binge at the pub or restaurants or you just gotta have that triple latte with half whip and chocolate sprinkles on top, be aware that your community does not always have the means to go out and do the same. There are many of us that are not fortunate to have solid employement or the right skills to make it in life.
I'm not saying stop spending. If the economy is going to survive the GLBT community can probably carry it on it's sholders!
Be responsible. Think. Act. Help. If someone asks you to spare a loonie or a toonie for a charity or a donation, give. If you see me selling 50/50 tickets and you know my money always goes to good causes, give.
Give because you can. Give because you want to and if you can't give cash then give your time.
It's not always about the money. Giving back comes in many ways.
I'm always grateful to those who gave to me when I needed it the most. I paid them back and those who didn't want to be paid back, I made sure someone else in need got my check...
A buck really does go a long way.
Until next time,
MOB09
It seems that in these difficult economic times everyone is looking for a little something. Usually in form of cash of check.
There is nothing wrong with that. I'm a beleiver of those who CAN give and those who don't know that there is no shame in taking so long as you give back in some way.
Every company today is cutting back. Every job and function and spending account is being scruitinized. I find that charities and not for profit will suffer at the hands of the current recession. Economist already predict that thousands of not for profit organizations in our community will suffer their demise over tight purse strings.
Then there is the GLBT community. Often you will hear people say: "The gays have money to burn because they have high disposable incomes". Great if you don't have a mortgage, a husband, kids and a dog to feed.
So before you go out on a weekend binge at the pub or restaurants or you just gotta have that triple latte with half whip and chocolate sprinkles on top, be aware that your community does not always have the means to go out and do the same. There are many of us that are not fortunate to have solid employement or the right skills to make it in life.
I'm not saying stop spending. If the economy is going to survive the GLBT community can probably carry it on it's sholders!
Be responsible. Think. Act. Help. If someone asks you to spare a loonie or a toonie for a charity or a donation, give. If you see me selling 50/50 tickets and you know my money always goes to good causes, give.
Give because you can. Give because you want to and if you can't give cash then give your time.
It's not always about the money. Giving back comes in many ways.
I'm always grateful to those who gave to me when I needed it the most. I paid them back and those who didn't want to be paid back, I made sure someone else in need got my check...
A buck really does go a long way.
Until next time,
MOB09
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Being Mr. Ottawa Bear
First, let me say welcome to anyone who takes the time to read on. I decided to blog and track some of the things that I will be doing as Mr. Ottawa Bear (MOB) throughout 2009.
I really came into this by accident. A few people asked me to be more active within the community and well, I'm like everyone else, short on time.
So MOB was having their annual competition and they asked me if I wanted to present myself as a candiate. Why not? While I'm not the one to prance around on a stage, I did like the fact that I could help raise funds for charity, participate in some fun activities and well meet some sexy men in the process.
I'm no small man. I think that there is too much emphasis today on the hairless, youthfullness of the typical male. That's not what most of us look like. It has never been a goal of mine to look like a tiny twink. Not that there is anything wrong with tiny twinks... That's the thing. I think there should be room for all of us as the table. (just some of us eat more than others!)
So I ended up winning MOB mostly because I wanted to make a contribution to the Ottawa community. I wanted the average guy to have a voice as big as his girth... to participate and to give back. I was not the sexiest of the contestants, nor the furriest, nor did I show the most skin but I did show a determination to participate and have fun.
I'll keep this into short for now. I wanted to set things up... but I also want to hear from you. What does the typical bear want to hear? What is it that you want to know and can't seem to get the inside info on? Is there life and dating outside of a bar environment? You tell me and I'll tell you what I know.
I'll try to do all of that this year. I'll share some very colorful stories and the places I will let MOB bring me to this year..... If I know the queer community, it promises to be one busy year!
Think if the blog as sort of Sex in the City.. but more like Bear in the City. Or just plain old out of the woods will do too!
Until next time,
MOB09
I really came into this by accident. A few people asked me to be more active within the community and well, I'm like everyone else, short on time.
So MOB was having their annual competition and they asked me if I wanted to present myself as a candiate. Why not? While I'm not the one to prance around on a stage, I did like the fact that I could help raise funds for charity, participate in some fun activities and well meet some sexy men in the process.
I'm no small man. I think that there is too much emphasis today on the hairless, youthfullness of the typical male. That's not what most of us look like. It has never been a goal of mine to look like a tiny twink. Not that there is anything wrong with tiny twinks... That's the thing. I think there should be room for all of us as the table. (just some of us eat more than others!)
So I ended up winning MOB mostly because I wanted to make a contribution to the Ottawa community. I wanted the average guy to have a voice as big as his girth... to participate and to give back. I was not the sexiest of the contestants, nor the furriest, nor did I show the most skin but I did show a determination to participate and have fun.
I'll keep this into short for now. I wanted to set things up... but I also want to hear from you. What does the typical bear want to hear? What is it that you want to know and can't seem to get the inside info on? Is there life and dating outside of a bar environment? You tell me and I'll tell you what I know.
I'll try to do all of that this year. I'll share some very colorful stories and the places I will let MOB bring me to this year..... If I know the queer community, it promises to be one busy year!
Think if the blog as sort of Sex in the City.. but more like Bear in the City. Or just plain old out of the woods will do too!
Until next time,
MOB09
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